i'm just like miss cleo. i am a psychic.
alanna: miss cleo always predicts when people are going to have babies.
morgan: *pretending to be miss cleo* my friend's cousin's grandparent's masseuse's plumber's dog's inmate's uncle. yeah. he had a baby.
Sunday
brains, unlike some people think, are not smart. this has been proven. you see, alanna's brain, which used to be very smart before it came out, is allergic to the scent of lavendar. our mother, however, did not know this. our mother loves lavendar. when alanna inhaled it (or, when her brain inhaled it) it got very frightened. it tried to escape. it got out her nose, toward the scent of the lavendar. we never found her brain. we think it was eaten by a ferret/monkey, like all things are in this universe. which is my universe. but as you can see brains are not very smart or alanna's brain would have gone out her skull in the back or through her ears or something.
this has been a short story by morgan stewart.
this has been a short story by morgan stewart.
Tuesday
alanna is a very foolish little girl. she kept talking about grail on her blog but no one knows who grail is. Grail is our cat. she's about this fat. about a foot fat. and. she's got a really small head.
alanna: AND SHES EVIL!
NO! she's just grumpy. she's white. with a black spot shaped like a butterfly on her head. and a black tail. she's 17 in human years
alanna: that's dead in cat years
yep. i mean-- NOOO. that's a hundred somethin in cat years. and. we worship and bow down to Miss Grail whose flab almost touches the floor. uheheh.
alanna: AND SHES EVIL!
NO! she's just grumpy. she's white. with a black spot shaped like a butterfly on her head. and a black tail. she's 17 in human years
alanna: that's dead in cat years
yep. i mean-- NOOO. that's a hundred somethin in cat years. and. we worship and bow down to Miss Grail whose flab almost touches the floor. uheheh.
can we say that?
on my blog?
alanna: yes.
ok we're gonna say it. we have just been on brittany's blog. i feel sorry for that girl. a couple years ago when i met her, her sister was running around the yard with a jump rope, and it went around brittany's neck and pulled off her head and her brain fell out and they managed to put her head back on but they couldn't find the brain. i think a crazy ferret/monkey ate it.
anyway she doesn't have one anymore. and that is why she is making crazy claims like finishing the lord of the rings when she only finished the first part (fellowship of the ring). what an idiot.
but we're not allowed to call her that because she doesn't know she doesn't have a brain.
she doesn't know anything. she doesn't have a brain to know anything with. alas. go to her blog and see what i'm talkin about.
you know. she said she was sad because people on titanic died. she's probably just said because she found out she didn't have a brain.
alanna: but if you ask her now she won't remember.
that's right. because her brain's just starting to function again.
.... wait a second they didn't find it. it's ABD -- Already Been Digested. heheh. uuuehhehehheh. *evil cronie laughter*
and that is the end.
the above narrative has been a short story by morgan stewart. except this time it was true. no animals were harmed in the making of this brain digestion.
on my blog?
alanna: yes.
ok we're gonna say it. we have just been on brittany's blog. i feel sorry for that girl. a couple years ago when i met her, her sister was running around the yard with a jump rope, and it went around brittany's neck and pulled off her head and her brain fell out and they managed to put her head back on but they couldn't find the brain. i think a crazy ferret/monkey ate it.
anyway she doesn't have one anymore. and that is why she is making crazy claims like finishing the lord of the rings when she only finished the first part (fellowship of the ring). what an idiot.
but we're not allowed to call her that because she doesn't know she doesn't have a brain.
she doesn't know anything. she doesn't have a brain to know anything with. alas. go to her blog and see what i'm talkin about.
you know. she said she was sad because people on titanic died. she's probably just said because she found out she didn't have a brain.
alanna: but if you ask her now she won't remember.
that's right. because her brain's just starting to function again.
.... wait a second they didn't find it. it's ABD -- Already Been Digested. heheh. uuuehhehehheh. *evil cronie laughter*
and that is the end.
the above narrative has been a short story by morgan stewart. except this time it was true. no animals were harmed in the making of this brain digestion.
ok. i just discovered today.... that i'm a psychic! i really am miss cleo's descendant after all. wow. you see how i know i'm psychic is there's this balance beam at school and the Savage Classmates try to knock each other off it and i got on and i just stood there and they fell over.
I HAVE THE POWER OF MIND! IT IS BETTER THAN YOURS!
alanna: that's not psychic. that's telekenesis!!
THIS IS A TRUE STORY! AND SINCE IT IS A TRUE STORY IT IS TRUE THAT I AM PSYCHIC! YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT PSYCHIC POWER IS! YOU'VE NEVER HAD IT! AHAHA AHHHHH!!
and this girl in my class said 'i don't believe that higher mind stuff.' and i said 'neither do i. they just think that i am and that i have higher knowledge and that makes them scared and nervous and fall over.' yes. this is true. i have higher mind but not really. BUT I DO!!! HAAA! HAHA!!!! HANGFA HANGFA!!! GANFAFA!! yeah. mmhm. yeah i'm done. but uhm. i need to go post something else. what i'm in favor of is gonna be new. mmhm.
I HAVE THE POWER OF MIND! IT IS BETTER THAN YOURS!
alanna: that's not psychic. that's telekenesis!!
THIS IS A TRUE STORY! AND SINCE IT IS A TRUE STORY IT IS TRUE THAT I AM PSYCHIC! YOU DON'T KNOW WHAT PSYCHIC POWER IS! YOU'VE NEVER HAD IT! AHAHA AHHHHH!!
and this girl in my class said 'i don't believe that higher mind stuff.' and i said 'neither do i. they just think that i am and that i have higher knowledge and that makes them scared and nervous and fall over.' yes. this is true. i have higher mind but not really. BUT I DO!!! HAAA! HAHA!!!! HANGFA HANGFA!!! GANFAFA!! yeah. mmhm. yeah i'm done. but uhm. i need to go post something else. what i'm in favor of is gonna be new. mmhm.
Thursday
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I am 58% Grunge. |
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I am pretty dirty, all right and, I reek of teen spirit... I would sell my own children for a moldy hotpocket, man. Take the Grunge Test at Fuali.com! |
"Results of the Sesame ID Test
Your personality type is: Zoe
You are a lover. Romance, flowers, and wine are all you need to enjoy yourself. You are serious about all commitments. A family person. You call your Mom every Sunday, and never forget a Birthday. Don't let your passion for romance get confused with the real thing."
this is who i am NOT.
alanna: who is zoe?!
she's green.
Your personality type is: Zoe
You are a lover. Romance, flowers, and wine are all you need to enjoy yourself. You are serious about all commitments. A family person. You call your Mom every Sunday, and never forget a Birthday. Don't let your passion for romance get confused with the real thing."
this is who i am NOT.
alanna: who is zoe?!
she's green.
| Disorder | Rating |
| Paranoid: | High |
| Schizoid: | Moderate |
| Schizotypal: | High |
| Antisocial: | Low |
| Borderline: | Low |
| Histrionic: | High |
| Narcissistic: | Moderate |
| Avoidant: | Moderate |
| Dependent: | Moderate |
| Obsessive-Compulsive: | High |
-- Click Here To Take The Test -- | |
Take the Affliction Test Today!
hey i'm rabies! look at my name! i'm rabies! i'm a horrible affliction! i like butter!
wow! hey! i'm data! i'm android! i'm from star trek! hey do you think they're gonna ask me to come to the conventions? uhhh.... i mean..... hey! my skin is as smooth as an android's bottom! because i have an android's bottom! i'm an android! and my name is data!
one of my eyes is smaller than the other!
"Results of the Sesame ID Test
Your personality type is: Ernie
You are fun, friendly, and popular. You are a real crowd pleaser. You have probably been out on the town your share of times, yet you come home with the values that your mother taught you. Marriage and children are important to you, but only after you have fun. Don't let the people you please influence you to stray."
heheh. funny!! i've been ernie all my life and i never knew it! i never had a rubber duckie, i never got to sing that song! now i know i'm really ernie and it's my duty... no, no... my PRIVILEGE to sing that song. so i'm going to do it. i'm going to do now what i have been deprived a lifetime..... 12 years.
rubber ducky youre the one *evil squeak noises* you make bathtime lots of fun I'M HAVING A SESAME STREET SONG CRAZE! c is more kooky thats good enough for me. and i am a cereal girl. mary had a bicycle little bark and a wolf from my friends.
Your personality type is: Ernie
You are fun, friendly, and popular. You are a real crowd pleaser. You have probably been out on the town your share of times, yet you come home with the values that your mother taught you. Marriage and children are important to you, but only after you have fun. Don't let the people you please influence you to stray."
heheh. funny!! i've been ernie all my life and i never knew it! i never had a rubber duckie, i never got to sing that song! now i know i'm really ernie and it's my duty... no, no... my PRIVILEGE to sing that song. so i'm going to do it. i'm going to do now what i have been deprived a lifetime..... 12 years.
rubber ducky youre the one *evil squeak noises* you make bathtime lots of fun I'M HAVING A SESAME STREET SONG CRAZE! c is more kooky thats good enough for me. and i am a cereal girl. mary had a bicycle little bark and a wolf from my friends.
ee ee shake your booty. do you remember your song. alanna don't type that. do you remember your song, though? it went 'eat eat eat... eat eat eat.... eat your foody' that was alanna's first parody. aha *tear* not really
alanna: alanna and LAYLEE'S first parody.
LAYLEE is nonexistant in my blog. just like you will be soon if you do not hush up! *cracks the whip*
*crack crack*
well i was thinkin about music the other day. actually alanna was talking about christian music. and i realized i've never heard any before. so i made up my own. here's the first song i made up that was chrisitan music.
"heck heck heck he went to heck"
isn't that wonderful? isn't that poetry
alanna: its the tune of 'duke duke duke duke of earl' from that movie. what movie? i dont remember. it had steve martin upon it.
and the other one went "baaaastard chiiiiiild" not that i'm making fun of christian music
alanna: you so are
i don't know any! i made up some and it ended up to be kinda funny. i didn't mean it to be.
alanna: you so did
like my parodies of rap. remember my Pablo raps? here they are.
"yo maaaaaa what's in the cookie jar nothing's in the cookie jar bum bum yo maaaaaa cuz i'm begging for some sweets and i really got eats yo maaaaaaaaaa" and it sounds like 'i've really got eat your mom' but thats not wait its saying! its saying 'yo maaa' and then it goes "hey yoooo wheres the cookie dough" did we make any other pablo raps.
alanna: is that the end?
no i remember we did. something about how the pablo sauce was good.
alanna: is that it?
no. .....
*whispers* that's it.
alanna: alanna and LAYLEE'S first parody.
LAYLEE is nonexistant in my blog. just like you will be soon if you do not hush up! *cracks the whip*
*crack crack*
well i was thinkin about music the other day. actually alanna was talking about christian music. and i realized i've never heard any before. so i made up my own. here's the first song i made up that was chrisitan music.
"heck heck heck he went to heck"
isn't that wonderful? isn't that poetry
alanna: its the tune of 'duke duke duke duke of earl' from that movie. what movie? i dont remember. it had steve martin upon it.
and the other one went "baaaastard chiiiiiild" not that i'm making fun of christian music
alanna: you so are
i don't know any! i made up some and it ended up to be kinda funny. i didn't mean it to be.
alanna: you so did
like my parodies of rap. remember my Pablo raps? here they are.
"yo maaaaaa what's in the cookie jar nothing's in the cookie jar bum bum yo maaaaaa cuz i'm begging for some sweets and i really got eats yo maaaaaaaaaa" and it sounds like 'i've really got eat your mom' but thats not wait its saying! its saying 'yo maaa' and then it goes "hey yoooo wheres the cookie dough" did we make any other pablo raps.
alanna: is that the end?
no i remember we did. something about how the pablo sauce was good.
alanna: is that it?
no. .....
*whispers* that's it.
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