so here's the fastest post i can possibly give you because alanna has things to do:
i don't wanna wear the uniform. i haven't been wearing the uniform. mr. brown, the evil turd, who also happens to be my principal, is going to intimidate me into wearing it even though there's nothing he can do to me if i don't. the teachers can be mean to me, but i cannot get in any real trouble, and i can report them if they give me any trouble. however, i am easily manipulated becuase i am People Pleaser. there is no way to understand my people pleasing. very perfectionistic. aaahhhh. whatever shall i do? now dad is coming with the food.
mom: YAY. YAY.
yay. go away. now. go comment and tell me whatever shall i do. whatever i shall do. whaaa mmm.

i got an organic tissue designer. no, no, no. i got hip displacia. no, no. i got oral surgery. that's what i meant. and they said, "are you scared?" and i said, "not really." and they said, "ready as you're gonna be?" and i said, "ready as i'm gonna be." and they always ask me what school i'm in. and i had to tell them, "i'm not in a school. i'm between schools at the moment since i've just moved past grahamwood and spiraling uncontrollably in the direction of white station and all the other spartanian misfits. ain't it awful? anyway, they gave me some laughing gas and monitored my heart and gave me some sedation which was beautifully, numbingly, drunkingly wonderful. just like the ramones said it would be. and i got to listen to tori amos the whole time. i was kind of asleep though. and i had a thousand tiny little dreams, most of which i don't remember. and i think i was also kind of delusional. it was one of the best experiences of my life. but then of course, i got sick. and alanna keeps telling me that she's been walking around in pain for five weeks even though it's only been three (which we have checked and confirmed). ain't that splendiferous? i have a little less than three weeks to walk around blindly in my own misery and woe of the neverending aching that lives inside of me on the roof of my mouth and on all sides of my teeth, only it doesn't really hurt that much yet.
alanna: oh but it will!
thank you, so much. you make me so happy about my life, slave. just like i'm so happy that i'm going to seventh grade next year (next week) which is supposedly the worst year of my life. anyway, it would do my poor old heart good if you could just give me some comfort please. send me a hundred buckets of ben and jerry's or a little get well card or a little note with a picture of a cow that says "herd you had a sore moo." that'd be great. so, when these stitches in my mouth dissolve, i might be better.
alanna: it won't. it will just make it hurt more.
i hate you. *sob* i hate you.
alanna: *gets brutally beaten*
i hate you. i hate you. i hate you.
alanna: are you done?
no. i hate you i hate you. how could you do this to me? oh me. i'm your sister.
alanna: *gets eyes clawed out*
i hate you.
alanna: ow stop it that tickles
i hate you.
...
thanks ever so
for typing this tale of woe
and now that miss morgan is dead and gone
let's bury her down there in the lawn

which francesca lia block girl are you?

(quiz created by shelle)

Which Willy Wonka character are you?

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